a&w restaurant: WHat should I do to show this man he will respect me and stop expecting so much from me. I am etrememly fed up with his babyish ways|||go out and live your life! have a day at the spa, go shopping , dress up all the time and neglect his @ss , men are stupid|||You expect him to be dependable, reliable, but when he treats you the same way, you call it taking you for granted. "Every woman marries a man, expecting him to change. That's her tragedy. Every man marries a woman, expecting she'll never change. That's his tragedy." ~ Oscar Wilde|||Since you have allowed him to use you as a doormat and that is his routine and expectations, he will think you have gone crazy if you change your ways, but that is just too bad and something he is going to have to deal with. It is time to go on wife strike if he does not make changes. He needs to know exactly what you expect of him. To make this transition easy for him to understand, sit down and write him a note, leave it for him to find when he comes home from work. You will be elsewhere at the time so he can digest what is written in the note. Now, for that note. You tell him that you are a loving and giving person who has been taken for granted and you are fed up with (list your grievances here). Speak your mind without name calling or sounding too angry as the new you is going to be calm and to the point without arguing. Your actions are going to speak louder than words. You must let him know you are serious and that you are giving him a chance to keep this marriage alive, and if he cannot comply with living in harmony and respect, then HE is choosing to end the marriage. You spell out the rest of what you expect of him. Sit down with him and divvy up the chores and be reasonable. Change your routine so he can help. For instance, you cook, I clean. I cook, you clean. I wash the clothes, you fold them. I dust, you vacuum. And, so on. Let him know that being in a marriage is being on the same team and for the household to run smoothly you have to work together as a team. Also be very clear that if he does not change his attitude about how he treats you, he is choosing to end the marriage for you. If you have children in the house, chances they are taking advantage of you as well. If this is the case, now is a time for a family makeover and for you AND your husband to delegate some responsibilities on them, using the team family reasoning. This is going to take some work and you need to be strong and consistent. Walking out on a marriage is easy. Fighting for your marriage is hard. But, unless you really make an honest effort to change things, then you will walk away and never really know if you could have saved the marriage. I cannot stress enough how important it is for you to let him know HIS behavior is pushing you away and if HE does not make it right, HE is essentially ending the marriage. So, if he does not give a crap and he does not make a truly honest effort, you know you were right and follow through with dissolving the marriage. Only then will you know that it was truly a lost cause and you can be free to go without a bad conscience or doubt. It all begins in the morning with: "Honey, please help me make our bed."|||Practice what you preach|||That's life. Men grow old, they never grow up.|||Truthfully boys just are aweful at recipricating the admiration that we feel for them. Again and again I find myself among a engaement between my brain and my heart. Over time ive learned that admiration fade but your thoughts never fade when dealing with a man use your common sense!|||Well..let me tell ya what I would do. I would make sure that I stay busy...too busy for cooking, too busy for washing his clothes, too busy for sex, too busy for him. Most men are babies..it's rather sickening.|||Truthfully guys just suck at giving back the adoration that we bestow for them. Again and again I find myself amid a fight between my my heart and common sense. Over time ive learned that affection go away but your thoughts almost never Thus when dealing with a man use your guts!|||Stop doing too much for him and tell him that things are going to be changing around here and stick to the new changes. He may not like it and be very angry for awhile, but if you stick with it and don't get an attitude, he will adjust.|||Sometimes couples do begin to take each other for granted. It goes both ways. However, if you want some real advice, here it is. Leave for a couple of days. Go to a relative's house and give him a chance to see what life would be without you. Oftentimes this also will give you a taste of what life is like without your love. It can turn out to be the very thing that brings you two to appreciate each other more often. Hope this helps.